True narcissism is an extreme obsession with oneself and a need to constantly feel loved and appreciated. There’s a huge difference between someone being selfish or having a more-than-healthy appreciation of themselves and someone whose self-obsession might actually be damaging to your relationship. Here are some signs you might be dating someone whose self-esteem is actually a detriment to your relationship.
1. He adores compliments and attention.
This man loves hearing only positive things about himself, to the point where it makes you feel the need to do it constantly. In most situations, just a good compliment could keep you in his good graces. He’s at his happiest (and your relationship feels at its best) whenever you’re putting him first.
2. He’s never wrong.
Whenever something happens in or out of your relationship, he wants to remain blameless. If something goes wrong at work, it’s always a coworker’s fault. If he forgot to pay a bill on time, it’s because whoever he owes failed to show up. He hates being blamed for anything.
3. He can never take criticism, even when it’s constructive.
If you’ve ever tried to intervene when he’s, maybe complaining about a problem at work, he won’t hear it. It’s not just that he can’t handle you disagreeing with him about who is at fault. It’s not even just that he can’t stand the idea of being wrong. It’s that he refuses to believe he’s not handling the situation the best way possible. He doesn’t and cannot hear you trying to be helpful or add a fresh perspective. He just hears you telling him he isn’t right.
Not only is he always the one talking, but he’s always trying to talk about himself to whoever. He’s doesn’t want to hear about your problems or accomplishments and gets irritated when you talk about them for “too long.” He doesn’t mind talking at length about his day at work but will rush through your own day.
5. Even when he’s wrong, he always manages to make you feel guilty.
He’s quick to spin things back on you even when it’s his at fault. You might go into an argument because you haven’t heard from him in a week, but you’ll end up feeling bad that you were the one bugging him because he was so busy. He likely can’t accept responsibility, and so if something went wrong, it has to be someone else’s fault.
6. He’s a charmer.
This type of men tend to be really charming and endearing. That kind of self-centered overblown sense of esteem can be compelling. It might wear thin, but it tends to draw you in, and when things are good, they’re really good. But when things are bad, they’re beyond frustrating and miserable.
7. You’re always doing what he wants to do.
You rarely get to have a choice on what you do on date night, or what you watch together, or who you hang out with. And it’s not because you’re laid-back. You’ve tried getting him to do things you’re interested in, and he just finds excuses or throws a tantrum or even bluntly tell you, he won’t do it careless if you like it or not.